Throughout history many thinkers and authors have spoken and written about self-love in its double meaning: self-love in a positive way (what we understand by self-esteem) or the form of self-love that can degenerate into pride and vanity .
Today we are going to talk about the necessary self-love, that love of ourselves, the key to establishing and defining our personality and giving confidence to our actions.
Self-love, in a positive sense, is fundamentally respect and care for oneself. Only if we are good with ourselves can we be good with others. Self-love is therefore something necessary not only from the individual point of view for the balance of our personality, but also basic to relate to others.
Without going into religious evaluations we cannot forget a wonderful phrase from the Christian Gospels: “Love others as yourself.” No more no less. Because self-love leads to a positive attitude towards others. Love is respect and dedication, it is a positive element of personal integration and social coherence.
Without self-esteem in our attitudes we cannot have a positive thought for our social functioning. Self-esteem helps us grow and be positive. Avoid depressions and pits that the person can fall into, becoming someone who only sees shadows without finding the light.
You have to grow in positive self-love and you have to do it taking care of your body and soul. Taking care of our physique we are affirming our personality: a healthy body is the best support for our thoughts.
For this reason, we believe that the first element to develop that self-love is to feel comfortable with ourselves. For this we have to self-analyze and discover what our virtues are and what it is about us that limits or destroys us. And after that analysis put the means for improvement.
We insist on the need to take care of the body. Because it is the visible structure of the spirit. It is our main point of support. Some people are better endowed than others from birth, but we can all improve our appearance, our bodily manifestations, our image.
On the other hand, both in the workplace and in relationships, it is important not to capture what we do not like about work or the people with whom we interact. Looking for the positive aspects of both things and trying to minimize the negative eliminates something very common and highly negative: the complaint.
Complaining hurts us and also increases our vulnerability. It is better to face what bothers or limits us and try to put the necessary channels to overcome it than the useless complaint that only serves to obsess us with problems … and nag those around us.
And two fundamental elements in the attitude: avoid envy, do not constantly seek comparison and, above all, do not look at the other with resentment because you think they have been lucky. Seek your own luck enhancing your gifts and qualities. And your will. Sometimes it is necessary for the will to act to get us out of situations that limit our personal progress.
Develop empathy. Look for those who try a path similar to yours. It is clear that the affinities do or do not exist. Do not insist on trying to change the other. Change yourself and improve and let others follow their path.
Empathy leads to altruism and solidarity. And never forget one thing: life often gives back what we give. So let’s make self-love compatible with love for others, especially those who deserve it.